Sunday, 10 April 2011

NaPoWriMo - Poem 9 - Whatifyou

Whatifyou
(Or, better call the National Accident Helpline!)


Whatifyou have an accident at work
Whatifyou get tangled up in wires
Whatifyou trip or stumble,
f
a
l
l
Bounce on your bonce
Like a rubber ball, neckbones
Mangled, eyeballs
Angled so that you look
At everything sideways?

Whatifyou slip on milk in the supermarket
Whatifyou go flying arseovertip or
Headoverheels, whatifyou trip
On the trolley’s wheels
And all your microwave meals
Go f l y i n g ?

Whatifyou crash in a smash
With your car, or a bustumblesoveryou,
Or you’re walking along and a long
Lorry worms your way
Resulting in a terriblecase of
Stubtoe or
Backbreak or
Headinabrace?

Then you’d better call
THE NATIONAL ACCIDENT HELPLINE

Well, either that,
Or stop being such
A clumsy PRAT.

3 comments:

Anna said...

Hahaha, fantastic! That's always been my first response as well.

David B said...

Nicely done :)

Whenever one of those lawyer type people on the street ask me if I've had an accident lately, I'm only too happy to ask them whether meeting them counts as an accident.

Apparently not.

Mab Jones said...

Anna - yes, agree!Just look where you're going, next time... :-s

David - ha ha! I think I might use that line as well, if you don't mind? :)